The joyful celebration you heard last Monday at 10:05AM ET was Toucher and Rich popping champagne.
That’s because the re-packaged Hillman Show emerged from the Entercom Worcester Witless Protection Program after being placed on the forward deck of Sinking Ship Dot Com. It’s the audio equivalent of an expired package of Ex-Lax in the back of your medicine cabinet: it hasn’t aged well.
Toucher and Rich, But Dumber is bland, humorless, and uninspired, so while it may be Murchison/Leung/John Henry approved, it’s insulting to anyone looking for a respite from Touch and Rick’s Mega Zoinks in the Morning. Greg Salk is detached and uninterested in his show, giving him something in common with the listener. Bland and formulaic, Sleepy Salkie’s show is based on an antiquated template, the same template used on fourth-tier shows in fifth-tier markets. If you buy a generic brand of waxed beans and rip off the label, you can hardly tell the difference between Sleepy Salkie’s Show and the 15th rated show in Anytown, USA.
Social media hasn’t been kind to The Artist Formerly Known as Hillman:
The Completely and Totally Marginalized Alex Reimer was removed from timeout following his hissy-fit after being benched to issue a PR Release disguised as a Media Column. I’ll save you the click, but his “Get to Know Greg Hill” piece is predictably a trainwreck. Teenage Blogboy Hammerin’ Ryan Hannable would find this kindergarten level schlock embarrassing:
The level of excitement Sleepy Salkie demonstrates for the move to EEI jumps off the page:
Moving to Magic 106.7 makes sense. David Alan Salkie + Enya + Sade = radio gold!
The Pissant’s piece is a hostage tape in interview form. Unfortunately, Hillman declaring that his captors are treating him well and providing him three square meals a day was edited out.
Rabbit-Eared Hillman took to the Twitter machine to fire back at critics… until suits at Entercom put the kibosh on the most energy Low T Salkie showed all week. If nothing else, Greg Salk is a good company man.
Every lineup needs a ninth-place hitter, and WEEI has theirs. Fire up the email service blast to discuss the latest news from Sheboygan!
My prediction: It won’t be long before Linda Marks is asking the musical question, Why are Hill’s ratings zero?
Consider this a tip of the cap to The Artist Formerly Known As Hillman, Greg Salk – he’s our BJBSJ Mediot of the Week.
- A source suggests Dale & Keefe and the OMF show are angry about the dogshit Hillman Show as a lead-in, fearing their respective 1.7 and 2.2 ratings might become the new normal for EEIdiots.
- Dale and Keefe, despite their plummeting ratings, are likely safe because ‘they work for fucking peanuts and toe the line without an issue’ per an industry insider.
- Greg Salk being outraged that Aaron Hernandez’s #81 is still in circulation while having no idea he also wore #85 is so perfectly Greg Salk.
- The on-air staff at 985 are universally giddy over Sleepy Salkie joining EEI.
- Blind Mike ripping on Danielle Murr’s status as Designated Overlaugher is amusing.
- Greg Bedard approaching the Patriots for a job in their scouting department brings a question to mind: What about the Wicked Hyperlocal Beaneating Chowdahead Lifetime Subscribers to the BS Jourinal?
- NBCSN Boston Libelist Extraordinare John Tomase is every bit the slovenly opportunist you think he is.
- Ben Volin is still a easily amused simpleton. Interesting!
- What kind of psychopath goes to get that small an amount of gas?
- Spoiler: The reporter that considers a drive to Foxboro a ‘day trip’.
- I’m #TeamDondero.
- Did the Red Sox get their dicks kicked in by the Yankees this weekend? Yes. Now, explain to me how this in any way diminishes the Red Sox ripping the soul out of Tri-State Area Bambino Fetishists during last October’s Gentleman’s Sweep?
- Third String WEEI Program Director Joe Zarbano is a world-class dummy.
- Tony Massarotti has a double-digit IQ.
- Jimmy Stewart aspires to Mazz’s intelligence.
- Mike Felcher’s servants are ordered by The Wood to cover his napkins in Lubriderm with extra spermicide under penalty of death.
- Bonesy Adam Jones needs assistance to lift his cell phone to his ear.
- Marc Bertrand loves Pepsi more than the fruit of his loom.
- Greg Bedard is still a thing? No? Good.
- There’s not a better recurring piece in Boston media than the weekly @patsscartel Emptying The Desk Drawer column on Wednesdays.
- @defnotgg is a warped genius.
- Stay off @SalSputnik’s island.
- #BJBSJ had it first. Again.
- I’m on record: @WWIIFelger and @patscartel in the AM? I’m all in like ________.
- @AlexReimer1? I’m out like _______.
- @davecullinane is the voice of a new generation. MY generation!
- Ty Law just picked off Peyton Manning’s HOF bust.
- Does Bill Belichick respect Ed Reed?
- Where in the world is Miguel Benzan?
- Dull Arnold is despised by his colleagues.
- Rich Teeth actually seems competent when appearing on air after The Artist Formerly Known As Hillman.
- That doesn’t mean Rich Teeth is good on the radio.
- Princess Venmo is literally sobbing rn
- Are Roman Swipes placebos?
- If you use a mallet putter or take care of your golf clubs, @jeremyboudrot will shun you.
- @mikewichter is on the Mount Rushmore of golfing partners.
- Source: Steve Robinson is a monotone voice in Kirk Minihane’s head.
- There’s not a better writer covering the Patriots than @ThatDaveBrown.
- @BootlegBarnicle? #OOTG.
- I’ve Borgesed @patsscartel’s column shtick.
There are an infinite number of stories in the Naked City. The list above provides an infinite amount of detritus.
As always – DO NOT GET THE EGGPLANT.
While Charred Finn weeps into John Henry’s bony bosom after a doubleheader sweep at the hands of the Evil Empire, BJBSJ gives you content.